2017 marks my 39th birthday. This is the final year until I dive into the next decade. I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting over the past couple of months on this. I spend quite a bit of my time working on my own personal development, as I feel each person should do. I have notebooks full of notes I’ve taken from books, lectures, workshops, webinars, blogs, and so much more. Out of everything I’ve been doing up until now, I have come up with a list of 39 lessons I have learned in my 39 years. What will resonate most with you?
First and foremost, time flies! Way too fast! My parents used to always say it to me, but I never believed them until I became an adult. And, now that I’m well into my adult-hood years, I feel each year gets shorter and shorter.
All the more reason to cherish each day. Each moment.
All the more reason to learn lessons and move on to the next day, which will inevitably come way too soon.
- Your mindset is extremely important.
- What you believe, goes. Henry Ford said it best many years ago “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.” This is so true! And he was so wise to say such a thing! If you’re going through life saying to others or even just to yourself that you can’t do something, I guarantee you that you’ll never be able to do it, at least not with ease. Start telling yourself YOU CAN, even if in the beginning you don’t believe it, eventually this statement will become habit and at that moment your mindset will change!
- Gratitude brings more reasons to be grateful.
- Yesssssss! Be grateful for absolutely everything! Did you happen to score a front row parking spot? Be excited and grateful to the universe for it. Did you happen to hit all green lights on your commute? Awesome! Celebrate it! Did you find the love of your life? Cherish it every day and tell them so! Every little thing and every big thing. Be grateful and the world will provide you more to be grateful for!
- You can not let your emotions dictate what you do, or don’t do, that day.
- We all have our good days and our bad days. We have days we’re sad, we have days we’re happy, and everywhere in between. Do not let your emotions dictate how your day will turn out. On an emotional gloomy day try your best to turn your day around into something positive. Or, what I rather do, is FEEL the emotion; feel it deep in your soul, and then, if you don’t want to keep feeling it, then let it go. Forgive yourself. Move on.
- Change is always possible, at any time.
- The only thing constant is change. Remember that. Flow with it. Don’t go throwing temper tantrums when something changes.
- Self-love and compassion are important.
- You come first. Love yourself and then you can love others. Be compassionate to yourself for everything you’ve been through. Be compassionate to others because you probably don’t have an idea of what they’ve been through.
- You attract what you believe.
- Do you believe in happiness? Truly believe? Then you will find happiness. Be open to finding happiness in ways you may never have thought of. Be open to attracting greatness into your life. On the other hand, if you believe in negativity or anger, then you will attract all of those things into your life. Choose what you believe in wisely.
- Believe in yourself.
- Speaking of beliefs, you should always believe in yourself. Self-doubt will no-doubt destroy you. When you start feeling yourself question your ability, then take a moment to remind yourself how wonderful you are and how grateful you are to live the life you have. Start believing in yourself, every single day!
- Set boundaries for yourself, and stick to them.
- Sticking to what you believe in, set boundaries. This can go for work, friendships, new people you meet, where you’ll live, absolutely anything! Believe in yourself to set the boundaries and to stick to them.
- Don’t compare yourself to others.
- Stop, just stop. I did this for so long and it prevented me from seeing my own worth. You deserve more than that. You are great. You are great in your own greatness. No one has your greatness. Bask in your own greatness!
- You can’t control how other people feel about you.
- Absolutely speaking the truth here. People will think what they want, about anything or anyone they want. Don’t go thinking about changing your ways because you want someone to think a certain way about you. It’s not going to go in your favor. Just be you. If that person likes you, great. If they don’t like you for being you, then they don’t deserve your time anyway.
- Finding that balance between tough love and compassion is difficult, but necessary.
- Sometimes love is tough. I think self-love is even more difficult. You have to find a balance between what you love and what it truly means for your “being.”
- Be open to sharing your story with others.
- People connect with stories. It may be difficult for you to share your story because it may be painful at first. Be open to trying. Once you do, what you’ll find is more than amazing. People that love and respect you will now love you more, just for opening up and sharing with them.
- Be vulnerable.
- This goes along with #12. Break your own barriers and let yourself be vulnerable. Obviously use your good self-judgement in these situations and do this in loving environments, but when you’re vulnerable to others then you become real to them, which is more than most people give the world.
- You can not change other people.
- Stop trying. It’s not going to happen. It is true that people can change, but they have to be the ones to make the change.
- Other people can not change you.
- Just like you can’t change other people, know that they can’t change you. Only you can change you. You have to want to change, you have to want to improve yourself. When you have that desire, then you can change yourself.
- Be mindful of who you take advice from.
- Just like the old saying goes “if he asked you to jump off a bridge, would you?” Be mindful of who you spend your time with. Your being is the average of the top five people you hang around. If you’re hanging around five super negative and lazy people, then you’re going to be taking advice from these people. If that’s how you want to live your life, then that’s completely up to you. But, know that if you choose to be around at least five amazing, optimistic people this will certainly change your mindset on your own life.
- Love yourself.
- Most importantly, love yourself. If you don’t love yourself then what is your life even worth? You are the most important person in your own story.
- You will fail.
- Without a doubt, you will fail. You will fail many, many, many times. But your failures do not define who you are.
- Your success will come through your failure.
- Your failures will lead to your success. Without failures, you would never know you were successful, and you would never be grateful for the successes you have.
- Ask questions.
- My favorite question is “Why?” I ask this all the time. I feel it helps me continually learn and dive deeper for further answers. It’s also important to ask other people questions. Be genuinely interested in other people. Sure, you may want to talk about yourself or brag about yourself but, to be honest, people don’t like to listen to that. People like to talk about themselves. So, if you truly want to get to know someone, then ask them questions.
- Learn every day.
- Learn at least one new thing a day. That’s 365 new things a year!! How amazing would that be!
- Apply what you learn.
- Could you imagine how fanatically fantastic your life would be if you could now apply the 365 things you learned in the year? WOW!
- Trust your gut.
- There is a truth to your intuition. Most of the time we don’t pay it much thought. But if you take the time to listen to the signs and feel it all out, listen to your gut. It may just take you down a new amazing uncharted road to greatness!
- Money mindset is real.
- Yes. It. Is. So, if you’re constantly thinking about “I don’t have money for that.” Or “I can’t afford that.” then what you’re actually doing is pushing money away from you. Seriously! We are a constant state of energy. Money has energy. So, think of money as a person. Yes, go along with me here. If money was a person and you kept saying “I can’t do that” over and over again then money would stop asking you to go hang out. Money would ditch you as a friend because you’re no fun, because you never want to be around him. BUT, on the other hand, if every time money asked you to hang out and you said “Hell Yes!!!” then money would keep coming around. You and money would become best friends.
- A person without a cause has no effect.
- Oh, this is deep! Yes, you have to have your cause. You have to know what you’re trying to do in the world. It is at that moment, and only until that moment, where you’ll be able to have any effect on the world.
- Invest in yourself.
- Spend money on you. Spend time on you. If you feel like you need a massage, then go get one! If you feel like you need a break from the stress at work, then take a mental health day.
- Things have to change in you for things to change for you.
- You can go on and on and on and on and, well, you get the picture. Whining and complaining about how this or that isn’t going your way will get you absolutely no where. Start looking inside yourself first, chip away at you, improve yourself and then things will change FOR you!
- Residual income is your financial security.
- I could write a whole blog post on residual income. You know what, I will do that. You need to hear more about this. You need to feel this. Residual income is money that keeps coming in from work done in a short amount of time when you set up the infrastructure. Residual income is money that keeps adding to your bank account when you’re no longer busting the hustle. This is my 5-year plan that overruled the previous 40+-year plan I had for my JOB!
- You have unlimited potential in your area of giftedness.
- UNLIMITED. This means it goes on FOREVER!!! You do. You are that wonderful. You are that great. You need to share your great gift with the world! Start today!
- Your inner world determines your outer world.
- What you think – becomes. What you feel – becomes. Think and feel happy = BE HAPPY.
- Surround yourself with people more successful than you.
- This was hard for me at first because I wanted to be the best. Accepting that other people are great in their own way first helped me with this. Then I started learning from these amazing people. I came out of my shell. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for them!
- Without implementation, nothing changes.
- Everything you learn, everything you read, everything that resonates with you is important. You can write a bizzillion notes in as many notebooks as the local stationary store will sell you but it all means nothing if you don’t do something about it!
- Expand your beliefs.
- As you’re learning every day you’ll be exposed to new ideas, new philosophies, new everything. Accept these things. You don’t necessarily have to believe everything but at least be open to expanding your beliefs.
- Have integrity.
- Trust. Integrity. Goodness. Have it all. Be it all.
- Discover your life purpose.
- Spend time actually working this out. Journal about it. I have discovered that we are drawn to things that form our purpose. Follow those feelings. Once you really, truly pay attention to them, then you’ll be able to see your purpose in full light, in all its glory!
- Take a leap of faith.
- Leap. Jump. Fly. Whatever. Just do it. It may be scary for you. So what? What do you have to lose? I promise you’ll regret NOT leaping more than you’ll regret leaping and succeeding.
- Live your life purpose.
- Finding your life purpose is one challenge but once you know what it is then do everything in your power and more to make it happen!!!
- Desire to thrive in every area of your life.
- Living is one thing. Thriving is a whole new level of living. Find the desire to thrive in absolutely every aspect of your life.
- The best thing you can do for the world is improve yourself.
- There’s a theme scattered throughout this list of 39 life lessons and it’s that you must come first. You must do your own personal development. You must spend time finding out what makes you tick, what makes you want to live, what makes you… you. Do it for you. Do it for us. Do it for the world.
Those are the 39 life lessons I’ve learned along my journey. I will plan to enjoy this final year in my 30’s and I will embrace the new decade, maybe with a new list of life lessons.
I look forward to another year of failures, successes, joys, happiness, and a thriving manifestation of my purpose!
Until next time …